Harry Potter and the Dentist II
by icecream401
Summary: Harry's yet again in the dental chair with Dr. Lovegood peering down at him...all of a sudden, he hears some very depressing news! Please R/R. Thank you.


**CHAPTER 1**

Harry James Potter sat at his desk in his bedroom. He was busily working on a Potions essay for Professor Slughorn, when he heard a loud, "OI, YOU!" from downstairs.

It was his Uncle Vernon, a fat man with very little neck and a bushy mustache. Harry was reminded of a business man if ever he saw one.

"What?" he called back.

"We're going to the dentist! Let's go!"

"Ah, I know how much you love Dr. Lovegood," said Dudley, running into his cousin as he bolted down the stairs.

"Ah, I know how much you love to eat fast food, so you look like a big boy, huh, Popkin?" mocked Harry.

"Don't call me that!" howled Dudley. "Only Mummy can call me that. And I'm not that pudgy." As he said this, one of the buttons of his coat fell off.

"I bet Luna and Bellatrix—as well as the other doctors there—are dying to tell you that you could lose some weight!"

"Shut your face!" yelled Dudley. "Mummy, he called me fat."

"Dunno what you're talking about," said Harry.

"Oh, Dudley, Mummy's sure that if Cousin Harry does that again, he's in for a-whippin'," said Aunt Petunia.

"Yeah," chimed in Uncle Vernon.

"I'm sure Dr. Lovegood is anxious to see you again," said Aunt Petunia, speaking more to Dudley than to Harry. "It's been over a year since we've seen her, hasn't it?"

Dudley nodded and burped loudly. "What'll you think she'll do to me this time?"

"Maybe YOU'LL be the one with the cavity, not me," said Harry, remembering how Luna had filled his wisdom tooth last year with silver.

"Will it hurt?" asked Dudley.

"Of course it won't," said Harry. "Not unless you keep your mouth open wide for Luna."

"Who's Luna?"

"Er – Dr. Lovegood, moron!" yelled Harry. He hopped in the back seat of Uncle Vernon's new car. Dudley clambered in next to his cousin and the family of four headed off to see Dr. Luna Evanna Lovegood.

"What's she gonna do first?" asked Dudley.

"I DON'T KNOW!" Harry screamed. "Just shut your –"

"We're here," said Uncle Vernon, blocking out Harry's use of the "F" word.

"Be a big boy," said Mrs. Dursley. "Say hi for us."

Dudley nodded and pulled Harry over to the front door, which read WELCOME TO THE LONDON DENTAL ASSOCIATION FOR WITCHES AND WIZARDS.

"Oh, my God!" yelled Harry. Draco Malfoy was sitting with his mother again. And to Draco's left was Pansy Parkinson and her father. Draco and Pansy were talking silently about the Ministry of Magic.

Harry and Dudley waited in line for their turn to tell the secretary about their appointments. There were a lot of patients today—Harry recognized his godfather, Sirius Black, and right beside Sirius was Remus Lupin, a former teacher at Hogwarts.

Harry watched as Horace Slughorn stepped into the office with a weird-looking dentist. When Harry walked closer to the desk, he realized that a sign had been posted up to show the dentists' names and their room numbers.

Dr. Luna Lovegood – Room 1

Assistant: Bellatrix Lestrange

Dr. Nymphadora Tonks – Room 2

Assistant: Dolores Umbridge

Dr. Cho Chang – Room 3

Assistant: Neville Longbottom

Dr. Ginevra Weasley – Room 4

Assistant: Fleur Delecour

"Who put HER as an assistant?" Harry thought to himself. "She's now PHLEGM Delecour. Hope no one screwed up my file with anyone else's."

"Hey, Mr. Potter," said Mrs. Tonks, putting a checkmark by his and Dudley's names and making them sit down.

"Draco Malfoy," said Dr. Umbridge, walking out of a room. "Hello, Mr. Potter. Are you continuing to tell the truth?"

"Yes," said Harry. "No," he added as soon as Umbridge and Malfoy were out of sight.

"Sirius Black," said another assistant. Harry's mouth fell open. It was Fleur. "Ah, Remus. It's nice to see you here on this fine day."

"Well, Fleur," Lupin said, "I'm actually here to support him."

"That's nice of you," said Fleur. "Bonjour, Harry!"

"Bonjour, Fleur, who I hope doesn't talk to me!"

Harry and Dudley began to look through the magazines. Every now and then, an assistant would come out and get their next victim. Harry received several hellos that day, including a few from Neville Longbottom and Ginny Weasley, who had abandoned her post at one of the desks to come and give him a small kiss, which he returned, leaving them both pink-faced and smiley.

"Pansy Parkinson," said Umbridge, coming out with Draco and clutching another file in her hands with the name Pansy Parkinson on it.

"What brought you in today?" asked Umbridge, leading Pansy down the hall towards Room 2.

Whatever it was Pansy was in for that day, Harry didn't get because he was distracted from that when he saw Bellatrix Lestrange, coming over to him and smiling.

"Harry," she said, "I'm ready for you now."

Dudley sniggered a bit and Harry glared at him. He followed Bellatrix Lestrange into the examination room.

"So," she said, sitting on Harry's right. "I'm going to ask you a few questions. Any problems with anything?"

"Nope."

"Any allergies to medications?"

"Nope."

"Well, good then," said Bellatrix happily. "Let's take some x-rays, shall we?"

She placed a piece of cardboard between Harry's back teeth and made him bite down on it.

Bellatrix and Harry sat for about five minutes. They didn't talk to each other much. Luna arrived shortly afterwards.

"Ah, my favorite patient!" she said dreamily, taking her seat to Harry's right, turning on the light, and getting a few tools out of a drawer. "How's life?" she asked. "Good? Bad? So-so?"

"Very well," said Harry.

"Same here," said Luna. "Now, let's take a look, shall we?" She made the dental chair fall backwards and had Harry open up his mouth for her. She put a small mirror into it. Luna was now in the process of checking Harry's teeth and distracting him at the same time from the dental work.

"Now," said Luna, "when we saw you last time, you had a little cavity. How's that going?"

"Goo'," said Harry.

"Good. And it's…looking just fine, too," said Luna, picking up the pick thingy and scraping plaque off Harry's teeth. "Your brushing has really improved since the last time I saw you, too," she commented.

"How many teeth are in there?" asked Bellatrix.

"Uh…let's see here…one…two…three…four…" Luna continued this process, ending up on Harry's wisdom teeth. "All thirty-two, Dr. Lestrange."

"Very good," said Bellatrix, turning the spit-sucker on and sticking it into Harry's mouth.


End file.
